The Nudge Word That Will Boost Your Life, By Enneagram Type

Have you ever wasted inordinate amounts of time just going through the motions, locked on autopilot while living far from your best possible life?

Don't pretend like you've never been there before. We all have.

When this happens, it helps to have a little reminder of who you are and what you would like to accomplish, so you can start living consciously again. What you need is a gentle nudge to reconnect with your goals and get you moving again.

Words are powerful nudges, and choosing the right ones can make all the difference in how we feel and act. There's a specific word for each Enneagram type that will really have an impact on your motivation. Are you ready to find out what it is?

Enneagram Type 1: The Perfectionist

Your nudge word is … Forgive

As an Enneagram One, you are defined by your perfectionist approach to life. You hold yourself to the highest standards and tend to project those expectations onto the people you work and live with as well. But sometimes, you can become overly demanding of yourself and virtually impossible to please.

For this reason, forgiveness can be incredibly liberating for you. Letting go of your crazy high standards and forgiving yourself and others for not always reaching that pinnacle of excellence can change your relationship to your perfectionism forever. You’ll continue to strive for greatness, but without beating yourself up when you fall short.

Enneagram Type 2: The Giver

Your nudge word is … Receive

Enneagram Twos are firm believers in the saying that it is better to give than receive. Unfortunately, too often these eager Givers neglect their own needs, putting them aside because they’re too busy trying to please their loved ones or anyone else that might benefit from their generosity. In the long run, this won’t be healthy. That’s why you let others give to you for a change.

From now on, try to remind yourself that it’s perfectly fine to let others spoil you. Whether it’s an act of service, a kind word or a physical gift,  receive their gifts of love gracefully and with gratitude. This will make them happy, and it will make you feel appreciated and validated.

Enneagram Type 3: The Achiever

Your nudge word is … Celebrate!

Threes like you measure your worthiness by your accomplishments, and your hunger to achieve more and more can sometimes seem unquenchable. You’re energized by your effort to keep winning, but sometimes you get so caught up in the process of achievement that you forget to celebrate what you’ve actually done.

If you take the time to celebrate your successes, you’ll learn how to enjoy your accomplishments more, instead of focusing so much on what comes next. You’ve earned these victories, so enjoy them! Otherwise, you may become burned out by the constant chasing of what lies over the next horizon.

Enneagram Type 4: The Individualist

Your nudge word is … Empathize

Your clear focus as a  Type Four is on establishing your own identity, one that is an authentic reflection of your own unique nature. The drawback is that you can become overly concerned with separating yourself from the crowd, to the point where you become aloof and detached from other people.

This can leave you feeling alone and disconnected, but you can counteract the tendency by developing your natural capacity for empathy much more fully.  The idea here is to make it less about yourself and more about others, so you can find the common ground you long to share with loved ones, neighbors and co-workers.

Enneagram Type 5: The Investigator

Your nudge word is … Re-engage

For enterprising Investigators, the highest goal is to achieve self-sufficiency and total comprehension, which you do by accumulating knowledge. Unfortunately, you may disassociate from other people and the real world quite often, too lost in your own thoughts to notice what is happening around you, or perceive what you might be missing.

The antidote to this pattern is to make a conscious effort to re-engage—with the people in your life, the hobbies or activities you enjoy, and with your environment in all of its rich colors, flavors and textures.  Re-engaging will help you develop a more well-rounded perspective on the human condition and your place in the world, while still preserving your commitment to independence.

Enneagram Type 6: The Skeptic

Your nudge word is … Empower

While Sixes do prepare for every contingency, they sometimes slip into a passive state of thinking that makes the world seem threatening, unruly and completely outside their control. The remedy for Skeptics like yourself is to focus on your own empowerment. To empower is to take charge of your fate rather than just reacting to it, for example, by committing yourself to projects that will expand your practical skills and increase your self-sufficiency.

The best empowerment will take you out of your comfort zone so you’re not just focused on your need for safety and security. Empowerment builds confidence, and thus will help you feel more in charge and in control.

Enneagram Type 7:The Enthusiast

Your nudge word is … Reflect

As an enthusiastic Seven, your moves are fast and furious. You’re always searching for peak experiences that will make you happy, satisfy your curiosity, and keep your energy and optimism levels high. But you want to make sure that you’re finishing the projects you start, preserving your most important relationships, and not shirking responsibilities.

For you, the best approach is to slow down and reflect from time to time. Reflect on the things you do and decisions you make, and evaluate whether they are helping or hindering you. If you don’t take the time to reflect now, you will be forced to reflect later, after you’ve experienced disappointment and heartache because of your failure to analyze the way you’ve been living. 

Enneagram Type 8: The Challenger

Your nudge word is ... Defer

If you’re like most Challengers, you’ll crave control in every situation. This may have directed you toward bold leadership roles your whole life. But when you practice a more enlightened form of leadership—one that shows self-restraint and defers to the wisdom of others—in the long run you’ll find it will only improve your capacity to lead.

When you let others shine it won’t diminish you, but rather gain respect for your generosity of spirit. You’ll become known as an inspirational leader rather than a controlling one, and you’ll have no trouble finding allies to support your efforts to be a powerful and positive force for change.

Enneagram Type 9: The Peacemaker

Your nudge word is ... Share

In your sincere desire to keep the peace, you tend to assume the role of a passive mediator. This means keeping your thoughts to yourself to avoid getting caught up in the conflict, which you fear might happen if you try to be an active facilitator of constructive change.

If you think back on your past successes as a Peacemaker, you’ll realize that you did your best work as a voice for harmony when you took on a more engaged role in the healing process. You have real wisdom and insight to share. When you share your ideas, others will see how valuable they are, which can only lead to a healthier resolution for all involved. And you’ll feel better about yourself if you speak up, because you’ll know that your words have the power to make a difference.